Build Your Confidence

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Many brave and important events in our history are not always accomplished by the most confident, outgoing people.

Sometimes we have to overcome things like shyness in order to bring out the very best in ourselves and to help our confidence re-surface in different areas of our lives, not just the bits we’re comfortable with.

The way to do this, is to reconnect with your purpose in life and to make your ‘Why?’ so big that you will step easily over any barriers in order to reach your core aims in life.

Women all over the world are willing to go through the pain of birth even after experiencing it for the first time, because the bundle of joy at the end of it makes it all worth while and we know the pain is short lived. We have no idea what being a parent is like, nor do we fully understand how much our lives will change and yet we go into it without hardly batting an eye lid. Nature gives women this uncontrollable yearning for a baby and I believe there’s a good reason for that – it’s purpose is to help overcome any fear of the unknown and/or the memory of that dreadful pain.

35 years on, I still remember all 56 hours of giving birth!

Anyway, that’s just one example of knowing our ‘why?’ and accepting that we may be fearful but we’ll do it anyway.

Other things in life are much less life-changing than that, for instance presenting to an audience, and yet the majority of people avoid it if they can. We are scared to strike up conversations in a networking situation and yet will think nothing of getting drunk and making complete fools of ourselves (and how many people have a drink in order to ‘feel more confident’?!).

So, one thing I’d like to do in this article is make you think about your strengths, skills and talents.

3 Questions:

When, where and/or with whom are you at your best?

What are you good at and what can you do, to encourage more usage of these skills, talents or knowledge?

Where could you stretch yourself that would make your heart flutter with a mixture of excitement and trepidation?

Our everyday lives must consist of gratitude and positivity in order to lead happy and confident lives.

In order to appreciate our lives, we must see the value in everything we do, in everything that surrounds us and in people we know and spend time with. We must feel alive by trying new things, feeling the fear and doing it anyway, and by  loving others, being loved back.

My favourite thing to do, to ensure positivity, is to reframe the negative or meaningless situation. Apart from grieving the loss of a loved one, this has worked for many.

eg ‘Ok so i didn’t get that job but that’s because a better one is round the corner and this one would’ve been a distraction.’

Ok, so I’ve been made redundant. This is MY time to do what I really love and use my redundancy money to re-train and make it happen’

Ok so my partner has left me. This is a good opportunity to be totally free before I meet my real soul mate’.

More than a silver lining. It’s about self pity being short lived and being used as a way of grabbing a new opportunity. You get the idea!

Our happiness and confidence does not rely on other people,  events or material things – it relies on OURSELVES.

Appreciate your talents, find out what gift you want to give to the world and GO DO IT!